I will take the example of another Doctor of
the Church, the great St. Jerome. He tells us of himself that,
when he had forsaken the pomp and pride of Rome, he withdrew
to lead a hermit's life in the holy places of Palestine. Here he
spent his days and nights in watching and prayer, in weeping,
fasting, and doing severe penance. Yet, amid the holy rigours of
a life so fervent and penitential, he had clung to one defect which
greatly impeded his spiritual advancement, and this was an over-weening
passion for profane literature, and a kind of aversion for
the reading of the sacred writings, on account of what seemed to
him their unpolished style ; for he attributed to the sun as he
confesses with great self-reproach what was in very truth nothing
but the fault of his own eyes. Almighty God, meanwhile, fore-seeing
that without the aid of holy books the Saint would never
reach that height of sanctity for which he was destined, administered
a remedy, very harsh, no doubt, but well adapted to make
him aware of his fault. He sent a grievous sickness which soon
brought the solitary to the brink of the grave. As he was lying
at the verge of death, God called him in spirit before His tribunal.
The Saint being present, heard the Judge ask him who he was.
He answered, unhesitatingly, "I am a Christian ; I hold no
other faith than Thine, my Lord, my Judge." " Thou liest," said
the Judge ; " thou art a Ciceronian ; for where thy treasure is
there thy heart is also." He then ordered him to be severely
scourged. The servant of God shrieked with pain as he felt the
blows, and begged for mercy, repeating with a loud voice : Have
mercy upon me, O Lord, have mercy upon me. Meanwhile, they
who stood round the throne of that angry Judge, falling on their
faces before Him, began to plead on behalf of the culprit, implored
compassion for his youth, and promised in his name that his fault
should be corrected. Then St. Jerome, smarting as he was with
the pain of the hard strokes that he had received, and who would
gladly have pledged much greater things, began to promise and
to swear with all the ardour of his soul, that never again would
he open profane and worldly books, but that he would read
spiritual books only. As he uttered these words he returned to
his senses, to the amazement of the bystanders, who had believed
him to be already deceased. The holy Doctor concludes the
narration of this sad history with these words : Let no one fancy
that it was an idle dream, like to those which come to cheat our
minds in the dead of night. I call to witness that dread tribunal
before which I lay prostrate, that it was no dream, but a true
representation of a real occurrence ; for when I returned to
myself I found my eyes swimming with tears, and my shoulders
livid and bruised with those cruel blows. He tells us, finally,
that after this warning he devoted himself to the reading of spiritual
books with the same diligence and zeal which he had before
bestowed upon the works of profane writers. It was thus that
Almighty God induced him to apply to that study of divine things,
which was so essential to his own perfection, and destined to do so
much good to the whole Christian world.
Scaramelli http://www.archive.org/stream/directoriumascet01scaruoft/directoriumascet01scaruoft_djvu.txt
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